He taught me how to love
But now I am not living anymore
Yea, I still do the day to day
But that is just to get by
When I began to love I felt so free
And it was all because
He was him and
I was me
Sometimes I wish that I could’ve overlooked that one thing
That showed me just how much he was a human being
It split my heart down to the core
And my made my love STOP right there and evaporate into thin air
I gasped for air but I still cannot breathe
Some nights I spent on the floor crying to God, “Why me?”
He taught me how to love
Like the colorful beauty of a sunset
And this just might be the only thing in my life that I’ll regret
Because when you learn how to love unselfishly and unconditionally
Each moment is like a picture on a moving screen
When you learn how to love
Love will...put you to the test
In how to learn to love even when it caves in your chest
Now that I know how to love
He’s not here to receive it
And now my days are spent wondering…
Did he ever meant it?
Stand your ground
stay grounded in your faith. Keep the roots locked into the soil.
Never letting go
because you know why?
Stand your ground
but move forward with grace
let your light so shine
all over this place
Stand your ground
and be like the tree that is in the water
be not removed because you know your father
Stand your ground
stand on it
Like you've already won
shouting, "I'm first, i'm first I shot the BB -Gun"
Stand your ground
walk tall and strong
love yourself the whole journey long.
Everyone in there life need’s a Mary Ellen either in their life or they need to posses her kind of character. Do you know which scenario you align with?
Mary Ellen is a wonderful women I recently met in the midst of a tough time that is rolling a tenderizer through my patience. Mary Ellen shows up and is playing an very intracal part of my life. However, each time I talk with her the things that she says is making me feel like she in an Angel. Mary Ellen repeats that she just wantS me to be happy and each time she says it, it is full of enthusiasm and genuine care.
YOU KNOW WHAT??? I want what Mary Ellen wants for me. I want to be happy to so from now on I am gonna do the things that make me happy. I am gonna let life touch me instead of hurt be. I am going to stop being a follower and become an OUTSTANDING student. Yep, today I have had enough and now I choose to live and to be happy.
Boss up and CHANGE YO life!!
Wherever you are, whatever you are doing, I don’t care how old you are, how much money you have in the bank, what your hair color is...It is that time of the day to do that BOSS check! Yes, how was your day? How are you feeling right now? What kind of music have you been listening to? How many negative things have you told yourself? How many mistakes did you make? How many times did you smile? Did you have a good laugh yet today? Have you passed gas on The elevator? How many steps did you get in? It is time for a BOSS check, let’s asses the day, reset if we need to, say something nice about our selves, drop a fake smile and let anything positively negative go.
Chin up, BOSS <3
Today was a long day, but I THRIVED!
I mean at the end of the night I am exhausted but I covered a lot of ground. School is back in session and my children and I are settling back into our fall like schedules. Today was a nice dose of what our Mondays will look like and how I can plan to do this better next Monday and for Mondays to come. Here’s what I do know, after work I have to pick-up from Volleyball, drop-off at dance and then drop-off at Football practice. This all has to take place before 6pm beginning at 5:20pm within a radius of an 11 miles drive in rush hour traffic. Here’s what I know, it is dinner time and neither child likes to be late to practice and they are MUCHO hungry after school.
Side note, why is it that they serve lunch at school and children are allowed to bring a snack but when my children get home from school they still raid the kitchen?!
I did all of that today and I THRIVED! I made it through. I am setting here with my children all comfortable in their room and I did everything that needed to be done today, plus I am still alive!
I did not lose my mind, nobody got hurt, I did not get a ticket.The weather was actually nice and I am here to write about. I even stopped and enjoyed a short visit with two friends.
Taking care of business doesn’t have to be all in the vacuumed tunnel of appointments and commutes. We can find the joy in living if we work hard each day to live in the moment!
My children’s father and I have a co-parenting relationship. We split up over 8 years ago. It wasn’t easy at first, but over the years we established better ways of communication, schedules and discussing other matters concerning our children. I personally feel that he has had it easier than me because he has been in a relationship with the same lady for the past 8 years. Which means that they have had the pleasure of a two-income household. However, I have to be proud of myself and the progress that I have made as the sole provider of my household. The children and I have accomplished some great things over the past 8 years and I am looking forward to what we will continue to accomplish in the years to come.
We are currently working towards moving into a new home. This new home will be everything that we need to thrive in the next chapter of our lives. I have had several dreams over the past two years about walking through homes and inside the rooms of houses. This morning I had a dream about an old friend of mine and when I woke up I looked up his name, Xavier, and the meaning of the name led me to the words, “New House”. We have been in the market looking for a new home to move to and we are awaiting an approval on an application.
This new house will grant us the opportunity to spread our wings and fly. We are going to soar in all areas of our life. We are going to exceed our own expectations. This new house will bring us closer as a family. We are going to create so many new memories. Most importantly, we are going to be doing this together.
What is the story about your new home? Perhaps it was your first purchase or your very first apartment. How did moving motivate you? How did you maintain your patience until move-in day?
I call this day a reset. Not a reset of back to the way things were, but a red pin on the map as to where I intend to be and for real this time. My journey begins with a simple journal exercise each day. Nothing too time consuming. What is the first thing that you do when you get up in the morning? Do you shower, lie there and listen, start a cup of coffee? What? For me, I lie there and I think for a few minutes while I look out the window. I noticed over the past few months that I would rather do that and write at the same time. So part of my reset is to write briefly 1st thing in the morning.
Why would I do this? Well because writing is priceless to me. Writing is a tool that I use not only to express myself but to also take that mental flight to paradise without needing a prescription or a “push-up man”. My goal for the next year is to write every day and to limit myself to only 500 words max. Why 500? Well, I am a Sagittarius and we tend to have a lot to say. Also, 500 because it is more than 350, which has no real meaning except 350 seems to low and thus 500 makes a wonderful max. So let's test this hypothesis.
Do something in the morning for about 15 minutes each day that makes you happy. Let’s clarify morning. Morning, is just a statement not an actual time of day. My morning could be right when I get off from work. It could be before I go to bed. It could be after an exercise. Whatever time of the day that peak time for you. My peak time happens to be in the morning before, oh 8 o’clock. I am a morning person. Absolutely love getting up in the morning and all of it’s beauty.
Think about it, get it together and implement it. Aim for consistency and expect the great!
The beauty of brokenness is way more than skin deep. It is not just about our hearts being broken or the quick pain we feel when we bump our head, elbow or knee. Brokenness is also not a once in a lifetime experience. If we are born into a world of sin and are influenced by it, our relationship with God transforms us into something new.
We go through stages of being broken. God is breaking us from our past, breaking us from our unclean desires, breaking us from our bad habits, breaking us from our addictions (not just alcohol & substance abuse), breaking us from our silence, breaking us from our bias, breaking us from our darkness to transform us into humble, repentive people that can receive all that God has for us in this life and the life everlasting. We come into the light so that we can shine and allow others to see so that they too can have the same experience.
I have been broken, many times and there is still more. The process of being broken begins when we start to see our unhealthy words, actions and thoughts and we question them. We question ourselves; where does it come from? Are they normal? Is it environmental? In association with friends, family, co-workers? Is it cultural? Then we feel repentitive – The desire to want to turn away and begin asking and seeking how can it be done. Then we begin that humbling journey. Of transforming out of something we are doing and possibly have done for many years. What will people say? Is this the Holy Spirit putting energy behind this? Somehow we trust the journey and then one day we look up and it is no longer an issue…We have transformed...It is now something of the past.
Let that be the condensed version because it may take years, months or days to transform and one experience of being broken may not take as long as another experience. It all depends on the fire of our desire, the maturity of our faith, the willingness, the tenacity and the belief that it is possible.
Brokenness is what we all need because it brings us to our salvation. Being saved from things that will lead us to death and the destruction of ourselves like; wasteful spending, procrastination, adultery, tardiness, addictions, improper time management, materialism, racism, privilege, too much pride, bitterness, disorganization, lustful thoughts and behaviors, dishonesty, debt, theft, capitalism, greed, bias, anger and manipulation.
God wants us to live a fruitful life. To live in the fruits of the spirit like; peace joy, lovingkindness, meekness, forgiveness, etc. but there is a process to get there and the process is found through a relationship with God. God’s spirit will mold us, break us out of what we thought we knew and into a new way of seeing the world by faith and not by sight. That is our destiny! And it began on the day before we were born.
Brokenness takes us deep like universal deep, like into another galaxy deep.
God is a deep spirit!
Queen is a Author/Poet that through her written works inspires, encourages and provokes discussions